My children have been very sensitive to the earthquake and tsunami in Japan. Probably more so than they normally would be, since their dad just went to do earthquake relief in Haiti. But they have been asking questions, wanting to know details and praying for the people there. Even Colin last night prayed for "Peese help the peeple be safe." He's not even three yet and he's aware that something big happened.
Its overwhelming to try and explain the unexplainable to our kids, particularly when something this devastating, of this magnitude happens. Where do you even start?
These tips are provided by favorite humanitarian organization of mine called World Vision. I found them so helpful and hope that you do as well!
1. Start by listening.
Find out what your child already knows. You can then respond in an age-appropriate way. The aim is not to worry them with the devastating details, but to protect them from misinformation they may have heard from friends or disturbing images they may have seen on television.
2. Provide clear, simple answers.
Limit your answer to the question asked and use simple language.
3. If you don't know the answer, admit it.
If your children ask questions that you can't answer, tell them so, and then do some research to try and help them sort it out. If they ask "Why did this have to happen?" don't be afraid to say "I don't know." The reassurance offered can be invaluable in helping your child sort through the truth that awful things happen.
4. Follow media reports or online updates privately.
Young children in particular are easily traumatized and seeing or hearing about the horrifying details of the quake may be more than they can cope with. Adults, too, should ensure they are dealing with their own emotions by talking to others, so they can continue to respond well to their children's needs.
5. Concentrate on making them feel safe.
When tragedies occur, children wonder if the same event could happen in their hometown. If it was an act of nature that could not be repeated in your area, tell children that. Placing themselves in the situations of victims is not all bad-it is a sign of empathy, an essential life skill, but watch for signs of excessive worrying.
6. Give children creative outlets.
Some children may not be prepared to speak about what they have heard, but may find drawing or other creative activities helpful to deal with their emotions and stress. Their drawings can be helpful starting points for conversation.
7. Model involvement and compassion.
Tell your child that, as a family, you will be helping the people in Japan by giving a donation to a reputable charity such as World Vision.
8. Give your child a chance to be involved.
Being involved in the solution will help relieve some of their anxiety. Invite them to contribute to the family's gift by giving something out of their piggy bank.
TO read more about World Vision's relief work in Japan or to donate, please visit WorldVision.org.
