Girlymama

curling up on the couch with a book and a cup of hot coffee.

staying up late watching baseball.

baking something sweet, warm and yummy. with chocolate.

comfort food for dinner.

snuggling under a blanket and watching a movie.

loving life, loving fall.

what are you loving today?

My husband commented the other day that I'm not nearly the emotional roller coaster my blog might suggest. One day I'm writing about loving my kids, the next I'm writing about bursting into tears, then how I love being a mom, then I lost it again, etc. It seems only thehighs and lows of parenting end up on the blog. There's a whole lot of 'normal' left out. I'm really not a drama queen. Really.

It got me thinking… how does this blog represent me? If someone found my blog who knew me in real life, would they make the connection? How is my blog different from my real life?

My blog shows the lows of parenting more than the highs. I post on the lows because I tend to blog more when I'm struggling, finding it
therapeutic. And I like to keep it real: my life is not perfect, my kids are not perfect and I'm certainly not perfect. As embarrassing as the lows sometimes are, I think they're worth sharing.  One of the most amazing things about the mom-blogger community is how transparent it has made the journey of motherhood. Its not all tea parties, soccer practice and cuddles. The blogging forum has made moms more brave about sharing their struggles. 

My blog is where the perfectionist tendency I've always struggled with doesn't exist. I strive to look put together in real life. If I host a playdate, my house is spotless, there's a craft ready for the kids and muffins and hot coffee waiting on the counter. I'm at Bible Study every week with my homework done, kids looking adorable, and I'm dressed in a cute outfit with a freshly baked treat under my arm. But my blog readers know that I often don't get to shower in the mornings, that my son threw a 20-minute fit about wearing clothes that made me cry and I was in my pajamas up until 5 minutes before I left the house, running 5 minutes late as usual. And that the huge pile of unfolded laundry is  hiding in my walk-in closet. 

My blog is where I turn to for advice, while in real life I rarely ask for help. When my daughter was being bullied, I hesitated to ask the moms of her classmates because I wanted to protect this other little girl's privacy. I posted about what happened, asking for advice, and was buried in comments, emails and even cards from readers. I found such great tips, personal stories and encouragement that I felt more confident how to handle the situation. It was amazing that people are so willing to share on my blog – even about the painful bullying they experienced as a child and kept secret for years. The transparency works both ways – writers and readers are vulnerable in ways they might not be in real life.

My blog is where I record our lives. Of course we take tons of pictures of big events and trips, but its the every day things that seem to slip away from memory. The hilarious quotes from a 4-year-old brain, the simple adventure of a day in the park, the sweetness of sisterhood blooming into friendship. That's what I want to remember and treasure. 

My blog is how I share with people I love. I'm terrible about keeping in touch with people and most of our friends and family live hours, and even continents, away. I initially started blogging to try to share our lives more regularly with them (my grandparents even bought a computer so they could keep up with the blog). All of my siblings and many cousins have blogs now and its a wonderful way for us to share in each others' lives while being far away. I've made friends through blogging – friends I've never met – who I've laughed and cried with.

My blog is where I contemplate motherhood. Why I'm doing this?  Why do I constantly deny my own wants and needs for
my family? Why am I willing to clean up the most disgusting messes and
cuddle a child covered in vomit? What enables a mother to do things she
never thought she could do? Am I more than "just a mom?" Do I want to be? Can I survive this? Not topics that generally come up while waiting at the bus stop or watching a soccer game.

So what it comes down to is that my blog doesn't quite show my real life. There are many subjects that I've deemed "off-limits" on the blog. I rarely write about my marriage. I don't touch politics. Many significant struggles we have will never make it on the blog. And 90% of my life, things are just… normal.  And boring. Its a cycle of cooking and cleaning and soccer practice and ballet
lessons and bedtime stories and cuddles and fights and  interrupted
sleep and running errands and laughter and laundry, laundry and more
laundry. (Why won't the laundry stop?) Obviously, no blog can portray our lives completely accurately – but it can present a different picture of a life, a peek at the inside of a family through the eyes of this mom.

This is adapted from a recipe in Martha Stewart's Cookies – a highly dangerous, very tasty book filled with 175 cookie recipes. These are fabulous. Between the melted chocolate, the chocolate chips and the cocoa powder, they are super decadent so you must enjoy them with a tall glass of milk or a cup of coffee!

Dark Chocolate Cookies
makes about 3 dozen

1 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
8 ounces dark chocolate chunks or chips
1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter
1 1/2 cups sugar
2 large eggs
1 tsp vanilla extract

1. Preheat oven to 325. Whisk flour, cocoa, baking soda and salt together and set aside.
2. Melt 4 ounces (1/2 c) of chocolate chips in microwave safe bowl along with stick of butter, on low heat, stirring often. Let cool slightly.
3. Put chocolate mixture, sugar, eggs and vanilla in bowl of an electric mixer with paddle attachment. Mix on medium until well combined. Reduce speed to low and add flour mixture slowly. Fold in remaining 4 oz of chocolate chips.
4. Use a 1 1/2 inch scoop to drop dough onto parchment paper lined baking sheets. Bake until cookies are flattening and surfaces crack, about 15 min. (Cookies will be soft and look slightly under baked – that's okay!) Let cool on baking sheet for a few minutes before moving to wire cooling rack.

Ann Clark Ltd: The Cookie Cutter People from Vermont: Their contemporary cookie cutters would be make wonderfully unique teacher or hostess gifts! And for only $5, you can stock up and save them for when you forget last minute gifts. The Kids in the Kitchen gift set would make any little chef happy and my train-obsessed son would be thrilled with the All Aboard gift set. They also sell adorable children's cookbooks. Ann Clark Ltd is offering Girlymama readers 10% off your purchases from now until the end of the year! Use coupon code BLGA4 at checkout. (If you buy four or more items, you get free shipping, so go crazy!)

b gifford designs: This gorgeous Etsy shop features beautiful and unique glass pendants. They are such a tremendous value, so lovely, and
can be mixed and matched with various chains for different looks.  Most items are only $9.99, so they'll make an affordable, fashionable gift for the holidays! Personally, this one is my very favorite. I think. Maybe this one. Look for a giveaway later this month!

Popham Lane: Another wonderful Etsy store. Personalized kids towels, reusable lunch bags, adorable aprons, placemats, and amazing quilts.

Grace Hester Designs: An Etsy treasure. Fabulous gifts for wedding, birthdays and baby. I would LOVE to get this Love, Peace & Joy Print Set for my friend's little boy. And this modern alphabet print would look fantastic in Colin's room.

Fresh Gems: gorgeous, simple handmade jewelry that looks much more expensive than it is! I am completely in love with this necklace.

I never talk politics on the blog. But I have to mention this at the risk of a comment storm. I WILL close comments if they get nasty, people. Be nice.

Today it was announced that President Obama has won the Nobel Peace prize.

Is anyone else confused? The newspapers are calling it a "stunning,"surprising" decision.

He has been in office for less than 9 months. And then there's my main problem: He had only been in office for 12 days before the nominations closed in February. Even President Obama said "I do not view it as a recognition of my own
accomplishments. But rather … a call to action," so its not just me.

"He has no standout moment of victory that would seem to warrant a verdict as sweeping as that issued by the Nobel committee." news.yahoo.com
"Clearly, the Nobel committee appeared to award him this prize for the
work that he has done so far and the potential for work in the future… Is it really that he’s built peace in the world or just wants peace in the world? That’s the critical question." cnn.com Lots of people want peace. Is he that unique there?

I am not arguing that he might not eventually deserve this award (if he does accomplish all of his goals). I'm saying this a little premature. 

What say you? (Remember, play nice!)

"Ellie, what do you want to get Annie* for her birthday?"
"I dunno."
"Well, what does she like?"
"Derek."
"Derek? Like the boy in your class?"
"Yup."
"Oooo-kay. Is there anything else she likes?"
"Butterflies."

That I can work with.

*Names of children who are not mine have been changed since they're not used to having their every word shared with the world by their blogging mom.