Its been a weird few weeks.
Losing Gracie was terrifying. Utterly terrifying.
A week later, the kids school was in lock-down for 2 hours due to a suicidal gunman behind the school. (I didn’t write about that before. Couldn’t even find the words.)
Two friends from high school died suddenly.
I’m watching friends and family deal with unbelievably stressful situations.
Finally, on Saturday, I ended up in the ER getting a CT-scan to see why I had a raging headache and vision problems.
I was laying there listening to the CT-scan machine whirl around my head, trying to pray to keep myself calm. What can you even say?
There was only one thing I could think of:
“Your will be done.”
I have seen so much evidence of God’s care in our lives over these past few rough weeks.
I saw Him protect and watch over Gracie when she was lost. I saw him bring her back in my arms, unharmed, when children are hurt and lost every day.
I saw Him watch over the kids, resolving the gunman situation with no one – even the gunman – being harmed, when tragedies like this litter the news almost weekly.
I saw old friends coming together, remembering friends.
I saw His care over friends and family.
I saw His care over me, with a normal scan and my headache getting better.
But I’ve been just smacked in the face lately with how much of life is out of my hands. And how the only thing that is certain is the sovereignty of God. And reminding myself that I need to trust that He is in control in a world that seems out of control. And remembering who holds my life, who holds my family and who holds my future. And trusting, trusting and trusting more that I am in His hands, that “even the very hairs of your head are all numbered” (Matthew 10:30).
Take my life, and let it be consecrated, Lord, to Thee.
Take my moments and my days; let them flow in ceaseless praise.
Take my hands, and let them move at the impulse of Thy love.
Take my feet, and let them be swift and beautiful for Thee.
Take my voice, and let me sing always, only, for my King.
Take my lips, and let them be filled with messages from Thee.
Take my silver and my gold; not a mite would I withhold.
Take my intellect, and use every power as Thou shalt choose.
Take my will, and make it Thine; it shall be no longer mine.
Take my heart, it is Thine own; it shall be Thy royal throne.
Take my love, my Lord, I pour at Thy feet its treasure store.
Take myself, and I will be ever, only, all for Thee.